Q : What life's gonna be after Graduate? (Letter for you)

Well, with that one million dollars question then a lot of a hundred dollars questions will follow up. My Graduation is less than a month and I started to have these questions pop ups in my head. Most of them are about life after Graduation, friendship after graduation, ect. I'll write it down and remind me please that 'I'll have to answer these questions in 6 months'


1. Could I and my friends stay in touch?
2. Could we be just as close as today?
3. Could we still hang out together with our new random schedule?
4. Would any of us change too much until we barely recognize each other?
5. Are we going to forget each other because of our new friends and environment?
6. Does 'Best-friend' label strong enough to make us stick together since we had different classes or even University?


Those are my big six questions since I can't think more of it tonight. Weird. I got a lot this afternoon but when night comes up....Oh, well. Anyway these questions are just the result of my paranoia. I'm afraid that I'll lose everything and everyone since these peoples are the most real 'friends' I ever had. I don't mean to be lame or act like a drama queen and makes everything sounds too much and too melancholy but that's just how I feel.

Confession Part I : What 'FRIENDS' meant
Ever since I could understand the word FRIEND all I can describe about it is that a friend is someone we can use to play, have fun, share some laugh and pleased. When I had a friend the only thing that came through my mind was this one "Do whatever she want me to do. Please her or you'll lose her. You can bear this but she can't." And as the result; I never say no, never argue, tried to not get mad even if she got out of the line. Stupid me....

Confession Part II : What 'FRIENDS' means, nowadays
For me, they are precious things that I will never let go. Now, I'm not only want to make them happy but I also want to protect them. I want to help them in any way I could. This time it's not like I arrogantly thought that they are the one who needs me but I also need them more than they know. I was lost, crazy and even heartless. I didn't know what 'care' means, I didn't know what sympathy means and hell, I don't even want to help anyone who didn't ask. But ever since I knew these peoples I understand and learnt a lot of things. I just don't know how to thank enough....

Best Wishes for :

Ariani Dwi Puteri

Azalia Zatadhini

Debby Damayanti

Endah Pangestuti

Irawati Ayu Rembulan

Kenanga Wungu

Sarri Setyowardhani 

Theofani R.R

Tyana Rahestrie

Thanks for revived me from whatever got into me

Best Wishes too for :

Dyah Indraswari

Putri Juwita

Maria H. Lado

Muhammad Hadi

Naufal Dzulfikar

And them who I can't write one by one

Thanks for being there and being patient enough to hear all my crazy whines :)

These are really nothing....

I Adore 'em (Part 1)

Friends and friendship are hard things to explain. There are a lot of ups and downs along with it even in the very first of the acquaintance. But one thing I'm deathly sure about it is that I adore these peoples called friends. Not just because they are there as friends but because what they are and what they had inside...

Tyana Rahestrie
I adore her, my little bunny :P. Everybody loves her, she know how to get along, she know how to act in the middle of any situation and she's adoreable. She might be petit, somehow look fragile but somewhere within she know how to survive even in the hardest scenario. She didn't think like a girl used to think. She didn't put emotion above logic which made her become that strong girl I know. I Adore My Little Bunny :) 
 
 Irawati Ayu Rembulan
My Ex-Chairmate :) She's talkative, can't stay put on one place with one thing and yet when her mood goes down she would turn soooo damn creepy :p. I adore her with her confident. She's smart, such a loyal friend and most of it, I adore her mind that always goes out of the box :) She's fashionable and always successfully made me feel so messy when I stand beside her. I adore my Ex-Chairmate :)

  Sarri Setiyowardhani
Little Miss Cutie/Emo (Random) Yeah, cut yet she had such a hard heart and head :p She's childish but somehow there are some points when she seemed to know what she really want more than the other. I adore her courage on spilling out what's on her mind without mind the time, place or situation. All I know, she's brave and even though she used to lost her way and point of view but once she made it, she know she mean it. I adore my lil' miss cutie/emo :) 

 Debby Damayanti
My Model Wanna be :) She's funny! Really! She's beautiful, friendly and really, really funny. I don't know whether she meant it but every words that came out from her mouth always something...unexpected in funny ways. I adore her beauty and her funny thought :) Honestly, I really think she could be a model one day. I adore my model wanna be :)  
 Kenanga Wungu
My Queen! I don't know why but I adore her so much. For me, she's a perfect figure of wife, she's creative, kind, friendly and it seems like she sees the world with beauty perspective which made herself beautiful as well. I adore the way she always look perfect and well-organize. In fact, I adore everything about her. I look up at her but well, I can't be like her though. If I can read aura she would be all over pink and peach. That's just her and I adore my Queen :)

 Endah Pangestuti
My Miss Glommy! LOL, I know, that's not a really nice name but she somehow always look gloomy. But well, she's really nice! She's just as logical as she's emotional. I adore the way she always notice about her friends and the way she stay strong when bad things come. Oh, one wonderful thing; she really really well-organized. She seems like had a beat with time :) I adore my miss gloomy :) 
 Theofani R. R
My Miss Adorable! Wow, I can't forget how much boys that ran toward you :p and just how slow your connection is. LOL. No pun intended, okay? Anyway, Fanny is such a sweet friendly girl. She's nice to everyone and so I adore her sweetness and her charm :) A lot of guy annoy her but still she smile on them and what I adore the most is her positive way of thinking! I adore my miss adorable :) 

Ariani Dwi Puteri
  My Miss Intended Smile :p Always, her smile means something and I had no dictionary to enterprise it. Anyway, she's such a fun girl, good at basketball and tough one. I adore her courage and her power! Even though she sometimes act grumpy she's actually had a soft heart -according to me ;p- I adore my Miss Intended Smile :)

Azalia Zatadini
My Miss Doraemon! Yeay! She loves Doraemon sooo much until sometimes I'm wondering; which one she loves the most? Doreaemon or her boy-friend? Lol, just random question. So, Azza is such a sweet girl, fun and active. She seems so in to social activities. I adore her matureness and her wonderful mind. She seems to know what she want exactly and had a good sense for which one is good and which one is bad. I adore my Miss Doraemon!!

 I Adore You

So, there goes the first part and hopefully I'll add the second part :) But since I got exams for a week....

X.O.X.O 

Cries and Confession

Okay, so today's school activities -beside studying like usually - was prying together for our examination. There was this guy from ESQ association that came to our school and gave us some talks about exam preparation. Started from Intellectual preparation, Emotional until spiritual. I knew I hate this thing so much but then I convinced myself that this would be the last time. I won't be in this kind of situation next time, so why didn't 'enjoy' this 'good' thing for once in my life?
  For what I noticed was that almost all my friends were cry because of the talk and things. Me? I cried, at last, since I noticed that I would be such a heartless person if I didn't. Well, doesn't mean that I didn't want to cry at all because of the talk things. The subject was really touching my heart and -beside all the emotional tickling moments- are very logic and made a lot of senses. I mean, it wasn't all about realizing who we are, what we want and our Creator but also put some logical senses that forced us -or in this case, me- to realize that we are fighting not just for ourselves but for our parents and loves ones as well. All this time I always tell myself that I don't really need these things such as school, good University and good future. But then again, I know they (my parents and everyone that care about me) will be really glad and proud if they can believe that I'll get the best future and life. So, the point is that I'll doing all these craps not just for myself but for them. Really, for me it is better to fight for someone else than for ourselves.

I got this point of view that we can take care of ourselves. When we did something, we knew the consequences and we knew -hopefully- that we could deal with it. But what if that thing happen to other people? I don't mean to underestimate other people than me but people's endurances are different from one and the other. Me, I personally think that I could handle anything. Well, if I fall then it would be me alone. I don't mind being along and fall by myself. But I don't think they'll think the same as I does. The thing is; I want to be there when they fall so they don't have to feel all alone. Because I know it's suck being along even though I said I don't mind, doesn't mean I like it.
So, about sacrifice and doing school's craps; I'll do it for my parents and people who care about me -which I doubt there would be a lot- so they would be proud of me and didn't have to blame themselves that they had failed from making me the best person.